Does anyone else have the tendency to hold on to things longer than they should?
That’s definitely me. Somewhere along the way, I developed this warped “once you start something you have to finish it” mentality that has had me holding onto things way longer than I should be. That has included:
- Workout goals
- House projects
- “Passion” projects
I could keep going, but I think that’s enough for now. I can get myself all stressed about a self-imposed deadline or project that, in reality, doesn’t even matter. And I am literally the only one putting the pressure on myself in most of these situations.
A good example of that is this blog. I originally started it as a way for me to keep up with my writing and to become familiar with WordPress and how websites work in general. Back then, I planned on writing being a much bigger part of my career than it has turned out to be. Which is okay. Because writing is no longer my passion.
Now, don’t get me wrong, I still enjoy writing. I journal on a semi-regular basis and each month I walk through a self-reflection. But I don’t have the same relationship with writing as I did when I was younger. I LOVED writing. I filled up notebooks with story ideas, my attempts at a novel, and endless thoughts and emotions. In college, I continued with writing as a main part of my studies in public relations. I still enjoyed writing and learned a different style (PR writing is very different than any writing I did in high school or the rest of my college classes). And as I started to work, I explored the content world further by writing blogs, website copy, ads, and lots of other marketing goodness. When I moved to Italy, I had strong intentions to write a travel blog.
But what I’ve learned from all those experiences: I don’t like writing as much as I think I do. Especially if I HAVE to do it. If there is a topic I’m passionate about or if I need to process, words just come flowing out. However, I don’t want to write for a living. I don’t even want to write as a side hustle. I just want to write because I feel like it. I want to enjoy writing, not feel like it’s a chore.
There’s a concept in yoga that I’ve learned and tried to tie into my life to combat my “you can never quit what you started” mindset. It’s the idea of letting go of the things that no longer serve you. If you set out to do something, say a certain diet or type of exercise, but your life changes and you realize that’s actually not what you want or need at this point in your life, why would you force yourself to stick with it? Our lives are short, and we have limited time here. Now that I am back to working full-time (and still teaching yoga a few times a week), I am learning that lesson more and more. My time isn’t just my own. So why would I waste it on a project or habit I really don’t even care about?
My pride can take a hit if it needs to. But having a healthy life — physically, spiritually, emotionally, and mentally — is more important.
In this season of finding what does and doesn’t serve me, I am trying to take inventory of the things I do on a regular basis. Are they still useful? Do I enjoy doing them? Do I have the right amount of time to devote to it?
One of the things I have decided to let go of is the idea of this blog. I won’t be doing the monthly reflections anymore (I’ll still be doing them personally though, so feel free to ask me about them!). I am not planning on blogging on a weekly or even monthly basis. I am not really planning to blog at all. I have a list of things that I would like to write about at some point. Just as a way to get my thoughts on (digital) paper. But I am no longer holding myself to a specific timeline.
Let go of what doesn’t serve you. You don’t have time to waste on those things, anyway.